I might be dying

At hour 14 we stopped for dinner.  Not because I was hungry but it was 8pm.  Not because Ladybug was hungry.  But because we were in our last major city and we were about to leave civilization for the last time.  It was either eat now – or don’t eat at all.  And I needed more caffeine.

As soon as I stepped out of the car I knew something wasn’t right.  I had strange pain in my foot.  It wasn’t bone (because we all know I break toes easily).  It wasn’t tendon (I have had those foot issues too).  It felt internal but I couldn’t figure it out.  When we got into the building I looked down and discovered my feet were swollen.  I could have guessed that earlier in the day because I could feel them starting to swell.

My ankles were not the size of a baseball.  Or even a softball.  My ankles were the size of softballs that had been left in a bucket of water for so long that they had swollen up and busted all the seems.  The swelling continued up my leg about half way up the calf.  Oh so attractive.  But aside from the odd feeling inside my right foot every time I stepped, they didn’t really hurt.  The hazards of sitting too long. 

I knew the only thing that was going to help was exercise.  I needed to get up and move.  I needed to walk (I would regret that thought later in the week).  I needed to get my blood pumping.  But I still had about 3 more hours of driving to do.  And if I stopped, I would sleep … not exercise. 

First stop was to the bathroom.  Ladybug had been sucking down any liquid made available to her all day.  And my bladder had finally given up, too.  So I decided to take advantage of Ladybug’s love of public bathrooms.  As she sat on the potty and contemplated the world, I walked back and forth down the aisle of bathroom stalls.  Luckily the rest area was essentially dead and I was not putting on a show for tons of people.

When Ladybug finally emerged from the stall I directed her to washing her hands.  There was an employee cleaning the bathroom.  After watching us for a few minutes:

Worker: Is she your daughter?

Mama: Yes. (And I was thinking that this is an improvement because at least she was assuming we were family first instead of asking if I was the babysitter).

Ladybug: We just look different.

A quick dinner (mostly not eaten) and back in the car for the last leg of the trip.  I watched the sky light up while lightening flashed above the clouds.  And worried about my legs.  What if I had a blood clot?  What if my heart was failing (my bio mom died of congestive heart failure in her 50s)?  I told you that I catastrophize. 

Have you ever heard that phrase, “You have lived in warm weather so long that your blood has thinned.”?  I remember reading somewhere that it is actually the opposite.  Cold weather thins your blood and warm weather thickens it.  So with paranoia running rampant, I blasted the A/C on my feet.  For the rest of the trip.  I don’t like the cold.  It did keep me awake.  And the swelling began to feel better. 

Seventeen hours, 16 minutes.  Just about 900 miles.  Three meals.  A few more stops for gas.  Four stops to deal with rain issues.  But we arrived – just after the “maint reqd” light went off (need an oil change).  Safe.  Exhausted.  Ready for bed.  At least I was – Ladybug had done a lot of napping and was a little wired.  But she also fell asleep fast once put to bed.

Let the vacation begin!

Mean Mama