When others watch the child

I have been sitting on this post for a while and since I am tired and not very creative right now I thought it would be easy for me to do this one instead of trying to think of another topic.

A few weeks ago I let Ladybug go for an overnight.  She has been on an overnight with this family a few times.  I am aware that I have different parenting then the mom.  She is not a bad mom.  Just different.  It is hard for me to let Ladybug go on an overnight because I miss her and love her and I am sure that I am the best person to care for her.  But she loves them.  And I remind myself that I have no need or desire to be a helicopter parent.

So I let her go.  The following afternoon I called to see when I should pick her up.  But instead of getting "I miss you Mama, please come get me."  I got "I am having to much fun to go home.  Can I stay another night?"

No.
No!
NO!

But I said yes.  And I worried.  I made her promise that she would call me before she went to bed.  And then I worried all evening. How can my 6 year old have a life outside of me?  I wanted her home.  But I said she could stay.  So I worried.  But did nothing.

And I waited for her call.  And waited. And waited.  At about 10 I called.  The mom answered the phone.  "Oh, they are out at the movies."  Out?  At the movies?  Our 6 year olds are out at the movies at 10pm?  With who?  Because she is a single mom.  Don't panic.  Don't freak.  So I calmly say, "Oh.  With who?" 

"With B's cousin."  You mean her teenage cousin?  It is 10pm?  On a rainy Saturday night?  And my 6 year old is at the movies with a teenager?  Which movie theater -- because there is about 50 in this are?  Are you kidding?  Who drove?  What about car seats?

Don't freak.  Don't panic.

I ask that she have her call me when she gets back.  And I wait.  I look up every movie theater in the area.  I wonder which one.  Which movie?  But what can I do...other than wait. 

A little after 11 I call again.  Because she still hasn't called me.  My 6 year old is out at the movies with a teenage chaperon on rainy Saturday night at 11pm!

She had just came in.  She was happy and excited.  I am so so so happy to hear her voice.  I  just want to hold her.  But I don't let her know how worried I am.  I say good night.

And now, a few weeks later, I still don't like it.  Shouldn't I have been consulted about who was driving my child around?  Shouldn't I have been consulted on who she abdicated responsibility to?  Oh maybe I am a helicopter mom.

Mean Mama